fuck Anxiety

5 tricks I do to keep anxiety controlled

Anxiety is something we all have if we didn’t then we wouldn’t know what was safe or not. Fight or flight mode wouldn’t exist and it would be a very dangerous existence. With some of us, we have this in extreme amounts, debilitating amounts, life-altering amounts. It FUCKING sucks. 
I have a lot to say but I will share more of that later on.
Here are my top 5 quick tips I use daily for when I am in what I call ” Pre-Panic Attack” State. I hope you might find even one beneficial if you do have extreme anxiety. 
These might be helpful tips short term or even long term.
1. B R E A T H E – D E E P  | B R E A T H I N G
How many times have you heard this? A LOT, why?  Well because it REALLY works. 
We know the drill, deep breathe in through our nose from the stomach (mouth closed),  hold and slowly release. Repeat. There are lots of methods of deep breathing, I specifically use the square technique. What I do is close my eyes if I am able to (depends if I am in public walking or driving) and envision a square, start at a corner and breathe in through your nose until you have reached the next corner of the square you are visualizing, hold for 5 or so seconds and exhale slowly through your mouth until the next corner is there. Repeat until you’ve finished going around the square as many times as you need.  Deep breathing is so helpful and no one even knows when you are doing it so it can be done anytime, anywhere.
2. M U S I C | W H I T E  N O I S E 
I ALWAYS have a set of headphones with me, I usually wear them when I go grocery shopping or where ever I might feel uncomfortable and feel too panicked.  
If you can play your favorite song, or white noise, ocean sounds or even just for some silence when things are overwhelming. This is one of the KEY things that helps me calm down a little or keep myself distracted.
3. P H O T O S
I have used this method a lot, suggested by a psychologist when I was going through some tough times. 
Photos of someone or something you love to do. I use my Furbabies as my go to. Looking at them will instantly switch your thoughts to a positive and hopefully that will change your thinking to get you out of that gross scared, can’t breathe kind of feeling.
4. N O T I C E | Y O U R | S U R R O U N D I N G S 
Usually, when I am in my pre-panic attack state I need to do my breathing then I might do this step right away if it’s really bad. I need to remember I am not in danger and I am just panicked and need to calm down. If I need to leave the room, or the store or even at home completely alone I need to realize I am safe and go from there. If you are in a dangerous situation then that is a different scenario and you need to get to safety. Usually, it is just anxiety making me feel that way and I need to remember that and change my thinking so I can continue on.
5. P O S I T I V E | S E L F-T A L K 
Lastly, this makes sense but it is difficult. A very wise psychologist said this to me one day ” How often when you are out and about are you worried about the way others are acting or how they look?” “Not at all” I reply. “Exactly, most people aren’t even noticing you, they are just doing what they are there to do to or focused on themselves.”
That was a crazy “ah ha” moment for me, of course, you feel like you are the center of the store or work or wherever you might be but that is anxiety talking. Most people are just doing their regular thing and not thinking about everyone else like people with extreme anxiety might be. So try to just let yourself know you are doing well, just breathe and take baby steps with what you need to get done for the day.
There are many types and levels of anxiety, as well methods that might work for other, these are just a few that I find the most helpful for myself when I need to breathe and be calm before I have a complete panic attack. 
I hope you can take something from this, or even one of these methods.
Please share what you do when you are in this crappy mindset and need it to change.

Self Care

So we hear this a lot now, but what does it really mean to you?

Honestly, it took me a long time to realise that self care isn’t selfish. I thought that not by taking care of everyone else around me and focusing on myself, I in fact was just selfish. Well, did that sure come back to bite me in the ass!!

self care is one of the most important things we can do for ourselves for many reasons. I don’t know about you but from a young age i had to work and take care of more things then a child or teen should have to in my opinion and eventually i lost myself and had health issues in the mix of all this heartache, stress and never caring for myself.

now it is 2019, time for me. time to heal. time to grow & time to share my story to show others how taking some time for yourself isn’t selfish in anyway.

this is just a small list i thought i would share with you guys on what i like to do for some self care. let me know some things you like to do or that you want to try!

remember if you aren’t healthy, you will never be your best self or be able to take care of others ♡

it Starts

The word Anxiety has so many meanings, feelings and side effects. dictionary.com tells us this is the definition: 

Very true. Reading that seems to down play how extreme some of us actually feel. If we didn’t have the flight or fight anxiety in us, we would be in a dangerous kind of living. On the other very far side of this awful scale reading this definition doesn’t sound as scary as it really feels.

Having extreme anxiety can really ruin your life in so many ways, relationships, jobs, everyday life and the biggest of all it can destroy your own self. I have struggled for years not knowing that I was not only suffering with depression but extreme General and Social Anxiety Disorder. I personally don’t like to call all of this mental illness or disorders. For me personally it just makes me feel panicked and feel even shittier about myself. That is just my thinking.

I don’t know about you but I always think everything doesn’t happen for a reason but everything that does happen helps mold us into who we are. I have always been told our childhood plays a huge part on how we grow as adults and that really used to terrify me thinking of every event that had let up to how I am today. So when I finally found the right doctor to help me with my depression, everything clicked. Anxiety made sense in a way and I knew those feelings from depression were more intense and extreme then just what doctors had told me in the past with having depression. Being diagnosed with anything that isn’t black and white answers is so hard and can take so many years to figure it out. 

There is an upside of our scary anxiety journeys and I hope I can help in little ways.

You know when you meet a person who has gone to school and knows everything inside and out and can tell you so much, teach you so much but has never actually felt it? 

Or when you have met someone who has lived through everything and can teach you and guide you in ways better since they know first hand how hard things really are?

I seem to connect better with the second type helping me better than the first kind.

How about you?

I had gone to therapy on and off for years but went through a few different psychologists before I found the one for me, honestly it took years to REALLY find the right one and she had sadly gone through some similar things as myself. It really sucks to hear that coming from anyone who is kind but it made more sense for myself to be able to work through my negative experiences and keep moving forward.

So I am here to help share my struggles, my journey and hopefully can help at least one person by these posts. I always wanted someone to help me or to be able to connect enough with someone to know I wasn’t alone as I see so many people with anxiety or depression that function so well, and I would ask “HOW do they do it?!”. I find since everyone is so different not all methods will work with everyone. 

I want to call this “Second by Second”. Sometimes Day by day is ok, but when you are in that dark scary place it really is second by second.

So here we start.

The “Brain Dump” most therapist I have worked with liked to start this as a daily, or weekly activity, I couldn’t agree more. Just GET IT OUT! Write it down, it will be a complete mess but it will make you feel a TINY bit better, if not a little better. 

If anyone is feeling brave, myself included (no names needed, let’s post our print outs and I have some fun ideas I hope we can do together as we get going in our journey. It’s nice to have a group sometimes rather then just alone….what do you guys think?

Let's Connect!


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